Nothing finalizes death like an Absolute Auction

I didn't really want to leave the house this morning. I woke up feeling that familiar pain in my lower back. But Papa insisted yet again that I take my anti inflammatory pill. And after a fried tater breakfast, I was all ready to get all glued to the couch and papa get some much need work done around the house, when, he remembered the Absolute Auction at a place that we have been caretakers, grounds keepers, maintenance dudes, and so forth, ever since the owner died a year ago. OOOPPPSSS

So over we went, to the Absolute Auction. Quite the crowd. We park. Walk up the hill, see all the house belongs out in the yard. Big furniture underneath the canape. Bedroom suites on the parking pad in front of the 4 car garage, 3 rows of smaller house hold items running down the hill of the front yard, the side yard full of boxes of books, the back yard full of items from the basement, people every where. When I looked up at the 3 floor window of the Queens Bedroom, that's what I called the 3 story octagon shaped add on, there are children in the window seat, faces and hands pressed up against the glass. 

When I went inside the house of the main floor, it was all gone. This house was once filled with a family, then just one person, then none. Now the furnishings are outside, the house is empty except for the dust bunnies left behind, and it was just all to much. I tried to converse with the Trustee of the Estate, but I was so emotional. I teared up and excused myself to retreat to the out of doors.

Then, as I mossied through the items, I hear the conversation of the groups of participants, and there is such a coldness to the conversations. These items were once what helped to build a home, now, it's just stuff about to go those wanted the best bang for their buck.

Papa and I spent a year watching over the house, the estate, the animals, and I was quite attached to everything, even territorial, now, about to become someone else's. Yeah, kinda hard to be there.

Then once the Auction started and people started to stake their claim, and stuff was going for like way cheap, and people were loading up their new prizes, it hit me that the death was final. Weird huh? Considering we helped dig the grave up on the hill. 

Big Mistake, Huge

Well... I tried it... the being independent part. Big Mistake... HUGE

It was bad enough going to the doctor's office and having this 'hyperventilating causing' pain in my lower back from lying on it for the exam... I top it all off by thinking I am gunna go grocery shopping at Kroger, which BTW, they have taken over the entire building of the strip mall up there at Dolphin drive, and BTW, they are putting in some type of canopy with 4 drive thru stalls, perhaps, for those customers who will take advantage of putting in their grocery order on line then having the store pull the items, then the customer comes and picks the order up, delivered right to the car, and to be effective by the first of the year... Where was I... oh yeah, the pain...

How does one describe pain? My lower back was hurting, and sitting in the wheel chair eating my oatmeal that I bought at the Starbucks, inside the Kroger, which, BTW, has no idea about the Beast Mode Frappachinos created by my second favorite Seattle Seahawk player, Marshawn Lynch, the pain didn't go away, it intensified. Did I do the right thing and just leave, noooooo. To stubborn to do that. Thought I'd stick it out and get my list done... Big Mistake Huge.

When I finally reached the comfort of my vehicle, I was hardly comforted. The pain was such that I had trouble breathing. The ache in my lower back was nothing compared to the pain in my muscle on my right shoulder blade.

After sitting in my vehicle for quite some time realizing the pain wasn't gunna go away, I decided that I needed to try to get home any way. Hard to breath, that is what the pain did to me. I won't give you a play-by-play, but I finally made it home.

After putting stuff away, getting something to eat, and plopping down on the couch to die, I did my best not to move and aggravate the pain in my shoulder and lower back. Papa popped in briefly and had to leave back to town. When he got home and saw my pain, he insisted that I take two of my anti inflammatory pills, yes, my much missed pills, to see if it would get rid of the pain. I will let you know tomorrow.

If I am feeling up to it, we'd like to get some ministry time in. Tiz been a while because of my health, or lack there of...

A for effort?

Yeah, feeling pretty good yesterday morning after having suffered the day before in pain. So I thought I'd chill, get some things done around the house, regular stuff. Then I get a text message: Deb, we miss you at Family Buffet? Visit us by 11/5/2015 and redeem $2 OFF.

Tempting, but I think I'll just stay home. Then...I get a call from Hubby. "Did you get a text from Family Buffet?" Well, I already know where this is going, he's inviting me to lunch. So I hop in the shower, dress, and text him my departure.

Quick stop at EAH to get a fax number so that my Vet, Burke Vet, can fax records on Lutan (puppy) so that my daughter Bekah can get him up to date on his needs. (Aba has a new dog.)

Dinner was a disaster, but maybe it's because I get to OCD about things, maybe it's just cuz some things are just...well... nasty. At any rate, my back starts to aching and I feel a bad rest of the day coming on. I had planned on going grocery shopping at Kroger next door, now I wasn't so sure.

After discussing my medical condition with my "Come get me, I am in to much pain" rescue person, we decide that I should at least go to Sam's Club cuz the wheelchairs there are probably charged up. So over I go.

"Houston, YOU have a problem" is what I text Paul cuz my loaned Sam's Card had not been returned to me. So Paul drives over to the store to give me his, I meet him outside the door in my wheelchair, and my Son takes a photo of me sitting in the chair. What can I say? I do what I have to do.

It hurt so much sitting in the uncomfortable chair. Now my back is screaming in pain. Can't get outta there fast enough. Paul meets me in the parking lot so that I can drive him out to pick up the 10 Ton Dump Truck, that way Michael can stay in town with the company truck and keep working.

Ah... there's no place like home when you're in pain. And hint... a 10 pound bag of potatoes should not be lifted when your back is killing you, just thought you should know.

Sooooo, I have a doctors appointment this morning. And I am gunna attempt to go to Kroger to finish what I could not yesterday...

I really do love the rain

It is hard to describe how much I have enjoyed the last couple of days... of rain... I live in the country, so I get the 'country' look of scenery, storms, nature, you name it. To sit here on my couch and look out my living room windows into my fenced front yard and see the colors changing, the leaves falling, the dogs coming in and out of view, all between the slats of my Venetian blinds that run vertically.

And then, the rain comes. Every leaf looks shiny from being wet, and they dance from the light caresses of drops. There's no Sun, so everything is the same tone, no shadows, again, hard to explain. The wind picks up and all of the sudden, there's a few less leaves on the tree in the front yard, my big Royal Empress tree with these leaves the size of, the size of what... the size of, oh, two dinner plates side by side, I guess... (Oh, and btw... I just did a Google search for the royal empress tree , and, awesome pics, especially of the leaves. Some of the photos show the leaves much much bigger that what my girl out front is currently producing.) IJS

Anyway, back to the rain, (it's a wonder I get anything done, I am so easily distracted) anyway, back to the rain, I love the overcast, grey sky that comes with it, such a pretty color. And dude, don't even get me started on dark and gloomy storm clouds... awesomeness... twice...

Help at Just the Right Time

How many times have I heard that expression, "Jehovah helped me at just the right time?" Many of Jehovah's people have expressed that same sentiment, and today, I express it along with them.

Just this morning, while enjoying my coffee, snuggling with my critters, and checking posts, one of my Facebook friends re-posted from 'an enemy of mine.' The post was an expression designed to elicit deep thought, which is certainly did with me!!!

As your life changes so will your circle

My enemy resurfaced briefly, like an inhalation and exhalation...

The text I sent to my husband, who gets my deepest, darkest thoughts was, "And so do the people in it." First thing I thought, not the first thing I said. Actually I didn't say anything at all to the post itself, trying to keep it positive. Besides, my FB friend has NO IDEA about the wounds that run deep from my enemy.

But Satan does. It was like, STAB STAB STAB

Then, I put my electronic device down, picked up my Daily Bible reading, and Bamm, just what I needed, Psalm 37. Have you ever read Psalm 37... I mean really read it? Allowing it to comfort you when you have troubles? Troubles with troublesome people? GREAT COMFORT, I TELL YA!!!

I miss my pills

As some of you may know, I sure didn't, an anti inflammatory pill can sometimes cause bleeding. Having said that, my doctor took me off of mine after I was diagnosed Anemic and when I had my blood tested and my hemoglobin was at 5, which is not good; normal being between 12-14, and I ended up being hospitalized for 5 days. Testing yielded no results as to where I might be bleeding from. Mind you, there is still one more test the doc wants to run, but he wants my hemoglobin level up more first. BTW, it's up to 7.7 as of last doctor visit.

Having said all that, I miss my pills. I have a degenerative spine disease and the last two vertebra in my spine are almost touching, hence the pain. The pills took the pain away. I had been in so much pain 2 years prior, that it was sooooo nice to be without the pain. I was actually a nicer person. Now, I am have more pain day by day, its harder to be nice, and Tylenol does't really help, maybe take the edge off.

I sure do miss my pills...

Tuesday night, meeting at the Kingdom Hall, and I had to leave early because of the pain. It's a pain that starts in my buttocks, shoots up my back, runs up both sides of my neck, and causes me to become sensitive to light, and makes me dizzy and nauseated.

Did I mention that I miss my pills?...

Wow, So much has changed.

It always does... So much changes, and sometimes in a short period of time. As I look back over my posts on Facebook and Instagram and Google+, I am reminded of those changes. I reflect on how it was a good idea that I had taken photos because some of the memories had been forgotten by my ever failing memory.

If I were to pin down the biggest change, it would be my rapidly failing health. It is the biggest change because it literally changes how I do things, from how I sleep at night to how I function throughout the day, to how I go to bed at night.

Honourable mentions are to include: the death of one of our customers and close neighbour who's children gave us a lot of the farm equipment to include a pretty spiffy Kabota tractor, our 1999 GMC Suburban being rolled 2 1/2 times with 2 of the 3 occupants being life-flighted up to U of L Hospital, my son getting married, finally getting a 1 Ton Pick-up truck (Big Girl) to replace the Suburban, which then left us a vehicle short, getting a Chevy Travers (Scooter) to replace our Mini Van we had loaned to our son who became transportation-less when the Suburban was rolled, 7 months later trading Scooter in on a newer model (Scooter2) on account of it being a lemon, having a rear blow-out on the 1 Ton truck and using the insurance money to put a flat bed on it, getting an older 10 Ton dump-truck, (no name yet).

My current hobbies include collecting Tarantulas, of which I now have 6: 3 RoseHair's, 1 Skeleton, 1 Mexican Redrump, and 1 Pinktoe. Way cool, especially at feeding time. I also like very much the Jamberry Nail products. I love picking out patters and getting my nails all dolled up.

Thanks for letting me blog. I was nice to sit and reflect. No regrets.